Wednesday, June 4, 2008
The Experiment...or ..Let Me Be Your Guinea Pig
When I saw my 80+ grandmother a few months ago, I was shocked! She looked as if she'd had a face lift. If you knew my grandmother, you'd know why this is ridiculous. She is the least likely woman on earth to have plastic surgery. What was her secret? She'd been eating aloe vera. Yes, that slimy plant for scrapes and sunburns. Yes, it's gross. Yes, it worked.
I should explain. When my grandmother was a young girl, she was burned over 60% of her body. She has extensive scarring on her body and arms. It itches. A lot. She also has eczema. It itches. A lot. Her doctor, who has tried everything else, told her that the "old fashioned" treatment was to tell a patient to eat an inch of aloe vera every day. That was all it took.
Grandma is a fantastic gardener and has aloe growing everywhere. Every morning for a month, she got up, cut a piece of the plant, skinned it, and ate the gooey insides. Within a week, she was less itchy. Within a month, the itch was gone and she noticed softer skin. Then she noticed that her hair was softer and people started asking if she'd had some work done.
Well, that convinced me. I need to try it. I'm in my thirties with the beginnings of crow's feet that I'd rather live without. I'm not really into surgery, but I'll try this. I'll be honest, it took me a couple months to get up the courage to even try it. It really is slimy, but surprisingly tasteless. I peeled a bit and swallowed it whole. It will be interesting to see if it really works. I'll be your guinea pig, or you can try the experiment with me. 30 days. An inch a day. How long before we see results? Or, is my grandmother losing it? Or, (gasp) has she had a lift and doesn't want to let me know? This could be a clever ruse....
I'll post crow's feet pictures every Wednesday. You can compare them and judge for yourself. I looked it up on line, and it's not poisonous, and there seems to be some agreement that this works. We all know that we can trust everything we read on the internet, so it must be safe.
Anyway, the experiment day 1. I ate the aloe vera. It wasn't as bad as I expected. My crow's feet look the same.
(I'll post pictures later today. I have to pluck my eyebrows first.)