Sew from Sew Infertile, a first time mom-to-be, asked a bunch of questions on my last post. It was too much to get into in the com box, so I'm answering it here. As always, I'm not a medical professional, just a seasoned veteran. If you think I'm wrong, have something to add, or just want to holler "Amen!" please feel free to do so.
So do you need an iv if you think an epidural is going to be needed. :) It's my first and I don't expect to go into this thinking I'm going epidural free with not knowing what to expect. ;) I'm going to go as long as I can but am prepared for whatever happens, happens.
If you are getting an epidural, then you have to have an IV. If you are a wienie about them (like me), then ask them to put it in your foot. By ask I mean, insist that it go in your foot. The epidural will numb you from the waist down. Your foot is part of that "down."
I like the epidural man. I think I've offered to have a few of his babies just to show my gratitude. Nobody hands out medals for pain. If you want an epidural, get one. If you want to experience the wonder that is an unmedicated birth, I wish you godspeed. You are a tougher broad than I am.
What about that gooey stuff they put on the babies eyes. I'm vain, personally I hate the way it looks, I know, is it needed. :) I know vanity, vanity, vanity. ;)
The baby needs the goop. They can wait a bit to give it to him. They can put it on his eyes while you hold him. Wipe off the excess.
Apparently, you don't need this. (See comments) I have medical history which makes it a good idea for us. Check with your doctor/midwife for recommendations.
Do they give the baby sugar water or something I heard and that is not necessary? This varies by hospital. If you want to know the answer, ask. I never let my babies out of my sight, so there is no sugar water. I also insist on leaving 8 hours after birth. I like my own house. My experience of what goes on after birth may not be the norm.
If a night in the nursery is okay then would a bottle through the night be okay if you are ultimately going to breastfeed? I just don't know what to expect so I guess being prepared for it all is good.
The La Leche League ladies may hunt me down for this, but a bottle in the nursery won't hurt anyone. Your milk supply won't come in for a day or two after birth. One bottle wouldn't upset me, but two would. With two or more you're affecting supply.
How painful is it? I mean is it the worse pain you have ever felt. I had stage IV endo for years and that was hell and then the surgery and bowelresection were I think the pit of hell. It was painful.
It hurts. A lot. The good news is that the better shape you are in, the easier it is. Not easy, but easier. I've had 3 with drugs, 2 without, and a c-section. None of them were so terrible that I decided not to have more babies.
I hear at least you get breaks from contractions as you don't with endo? Contractions rise and fall like a wave. You'll get breaks. The breaks will get smaller the closer you get to delivery.
I hear of a lot of episiotimies (sp?) when are they necessary? I really would like to avoid that at all cost. ;) hahaha That is a matter of big debate. Very large babies can tear their way out. (ouch!) Some doctors think an incision is easier to repair. Both hurt. Ask for warm compresses for the perineum while you are in labor. I've heard good things about perineal massage to stretch things out. I've never tried it, but it couldn't hurt to look into it.
Do I need someone to teach me how to breastfeed like a lacation cosultant. Do they have those at the hospital or do I have to find one? Can I read a book? Yes, you can read a book. I don't have one to recommend. My babies and I have always figured it out on our own. Most people figure it out. If you can't, the lactation consultants are good, but don't know everything. If you need more help, call La Leche or ask an experienced mom.
I hear the first few weeks your nipples hurt and it's painful. Is that normal, should it be painful? It can be painful. It should not be excruciating. They may crack and bleed. They should not get infected and pus filled. Hot showers help. The cream they give you in the hospital helps. Knowing that it is temporary helps. The sight of that sweet face helps the most.
I hope I've answered them all with the information you were needing. Please email me if you need more help, information, or moral support.
11 comments:
Awesome stuff! I don't like medical advice, I like veteran advice!!!! hahahaha Medical advice is for the birds! :)
I'm thankful my Dr. is a very relaxed "you got this" don't go crazy reading every book kind of guy. ;)
I need that after the stress of IF. I just want to cruise control through and God willing just learn as I go through each birth. ;)
I doubt my baby will be out of my sight though, I waited too long. That could very well be DH's first night shift if I'm "that" tired. hahahaaha
This helps a ton! Thank you!
The baby actually doesn't necessarily need the gunk they put in their eyes. It's erythromyacin and the purpose is to prevent the baby from contracting certain STDs (if I could spell the specific ones I would!) in the vaginal canals. If you don't have an STD your baby doesn't need the gunk. You can deny it if you want. We didn't want it with our babies and our midwife said it wasn't even really necessary. But if you do get it, I would delay it because it blurs the baby's vision and you want that time for bonding. So many things hospitals do are "routine procedures" and you really have to sort through and see if it's really necessary for YOUR baby.
unless you have syphillis (gah! spelling!) you don't need the gunk in the eyes. you can sign off on anything (vaccines, vit k, the gunk, whatever) so don't let some grouchy nurse/doctor tell you otherwise.
you are not there to make any nurse and/or doctor's life more convenient. DO NOT WORRY about being demanding or requiring more information before makind decisions. you are paying them, not the other way around.
your nipples will hurt for about 2 weeks. crack, bleed - maybe. remember, if your nipples are bleeding, the baby may ingest some of the blood when nursing. if they spit up, it may be a little red. just keep that in mind.
our bradley teacher had a great way of looking at episiotomies (holy. cow. i hate spelling). she compared it to ripping fabric. if you hold out fabric and use sissors to cut a small cut and then pull at both ends, the fabric will tear very easily and very far. if you just pull at the fabric without cutting it first, it may tear, but not in a straight line and not easily. same with you. you may tear, you may not. it's all to do with the sewing up in the end. docs like episiotimes coz it's easier to sew at the end - FOR THEM. just a thought. (my biggest baby was 9.10 and no tears. my 9.6 i tore 1 and the other 2. everybody's different, though)
i agree with the fact there are many "routine" procedures. find out ahead of time if what they are and if you want them. if not, write it out and have your doctor sign off on it. take a copy with you so there can be no mistake. if you don't trust your wishes will be followed (or are paranoid like i am) keep baby with you at all times. go with baby wherever it goes. nursery, hearing test, whatever. you are there, watching. and don't feel bad about it. not one bit.
If they won't let you refuse the IV, get a Hep Lock one.
bring a doula/bitchy friend ;) if you need help.
i wish you the best birth - it's an honor to welcome new life into the world! congrats!
You need 2L of IV fluids before an epidural is placed. So that IV will be placed long before you are numb. An IV in the foot is pretty common in newborns and small children and people who have been in the hospital a long time and blown every other vein. It will be difficult to convince an L&D nurse to place it in your foot. It will really get in way during birth. Many hospitals will numb you either with EMLA cream or lidocaine before placing an IV. Just make sure you tell them you want/need numbing asap so they can get the orders they need for it.
Favorite book on breastfeeding: The Nursing Mothers Companion by Kathleen Huggins
Episiotomy: rarely necessary. A little tear is way less painful and heals quicker than a big honkin' episiotomy. Unless you are going to completely blow out your perineum-which is unlikely unless you have a HUGE baby and/or are purple pushing (holding your breath and pushinig as hard as you can)with a provider who isn't supporting your perineum, a natural tear is better.
Childbirth hurts. But contractions do come and go and usually, when you hit the point that you think you can't do it a moment more, the baby comes. It is a finite pain, you know it will end and the reward in the end is just amazing. After all that pain, sweat and hard work someone hands you a BABY!! Like this:
http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y11/kmomto6/MAX2.jpg
My latest at about 5 minutes old.
I've had three with epidurals (including one C-section), 1 with a little stadol and 5 unmedicated. At some point during every unmedicated labor I say to myself "WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!" and "I'm never doing this again!!!" but I am always happy with my decision and I do do it again....obviously :D
Choose your OB-midwife carefully along with your facility. Policies and procedures vary WILDLY, even in the same area. My OB (who is a midwife at heart)catches in two hospitals about a mile apart. One is ALL about mother-baby bonding and nursing, is fine with co-sleeping in the hospital beds, extremely supportive of breastfeeding and is fine with NO mother-baby separation. The other? Mandatory 3-4 hour nursery observation, little respect for mother-baby time, breastfeeding support is a joke...but it is the PRETTIEST decor of any maternity unit around. :P while the other hospital is a bit out-dated looking with tiny rooms. Me, I'll take the awesome staff and tiny room over the nurse ratched's in the Hilton.
The only thing I would add is this: IF you are going to get pitocin, INSIST on the epidural getting placed FIRST (DO NOT EVER believe the hosp. staff if they say "the anesth. is on his way" I've been busted THREE times on that one and it was hell on earth) also, if you need an epidural anyway, let the nurse wait until it's placed and working before they ever cath you. WHY? Because it's gross and uncomfortable, THAT'S why!!! With my last one (10lbs, 3 oz) the epidural stopped working and I could start to feel the pain again, I insisted on seeing the anesth. again and he put in a different med that did work...so if it stops working or gets weaker, insist that you need something else or WHAT'S THE POINT??? I DIDN'T insist on my 4th one (the 10 pound, SIX ounce one!) and had to go through delivery without pain relief. SUCKS ROCKS!
Also, I had the first without pain relief at all and they gave me an episiotomy. With the next ones, I MADE them NOT do that and I healed within days vs weeks. I would recommend against it. I didn't tear at all, even with the bigger babies. My second was 9lbs, 6 oz and I tore my scar...which tells me it might not have been bad had I not HAD A SCAR IN THE FIRST PLACE!!! The stitches on that one only took about 4 days to heal but the stitches on the cut (which cuts through muscle and skin) took a full 6 weeks to heal.
I think doctors are getting better and better about listening to their patients.
OH! Another thing to consider which a lot of people don't know about, is informed consent and the laws in your state about storage of your baby's DNA (the blood droplet to test for PKU, etc.) Here's a good site that talks about baby DNA: http://www.cchconline.org/issues/NewbornGeneticTestingMN.php I know it's one more thing to think about but it's very important to have INFORMED consent (which, I argue, most if not all hospitals do NOT provide about the storage of the DNA and it's use in research)
So, GOD BLESS all new moms and know that we will be with you when you join "the club" of women who've survived delivery!
For the first time I received a form to send in to have my baby's PKU card destroyed after testing.
Does anyone of you live in the South and can be my bitchy friend! ;) hahaha
Call me. I'll come and be your bitchy friend.
K-that picture made me think I will do absolutely ANYTHING just to have that! ;) Anything, I don't even care! Give birth in Time Square, I don't care! In a barn, sewer, whatever. ;)
I am eleven days post-partum with my fourth, so my perspective is still very fresh. ;-) In no particular order.
With my first I had IV narcotics (demerol), so I tell people after that horrible experience either get the big gun (epidural) or go natural..do not try to half-ass it with IV narcotics. It just makes you too cloudy to effectively deal with the pain. And it knocks your baby out, too.
The last three I had completely without any pain medication. (I'm scared of the epidural needle and have platelet issues that make it inadvisable.)
I did have a LOW DOSE of pitocin with this recent delivery...I was ten hours in on no sleep (labor started at midnight) and my labor had stalled for about four hours. I was very hesitant at first to do it, but now I am glad that I did. My contractions sped up but not at an unmanageable rate and I delivered two hours later.
I had an episiotomy and tore with my first and had a horrible recovery. No episiotomy and no stitches with #2. No episiotomy and one stitch with #3. No episiotomy, but #4 was face-up and tore open the old scar...seven stitches. But recovery hasn't been too bad.
I breastfeed exclusively. My milk came in on day four, and I got slightly engorged which led to cracked and really sore nipples. But after three days the pressure went down, and now we're working on establishing good latch, nipples are healing, and it is starting to get more pleasant.
I also tell first-timers:
1. Get a Certified Nurse Midwife instead of an OB if you can...they are less likely to be set in their ways and schedule.
2. After you deliver, keep track of your pain med. schedule and request your meds. 30 minutes before you're due for them. For the first few days, do not let one dose wear off without the next one already being in your system.
3. Pack lots of easy to eat snacks (cereal, cookies, graham crackers) and order extra snack items (fruit) with your meals if you plan to stay in the hospital the full 48 hours. Besides your three square meals a day, the nurses only give you stale graham crackers.
As for the pain of childbirth...YES, it hurts. A lot (especially if they're face up). It feels like increasingly bad menstrual cramps followed by the largest hardest poop you ever had in your life.
But then the endorphins kick in when it's over, and when you hold your new baby you feel like you just ate the most divine piece of chocolate cake in your life.
Could I put in a plug for a couple of breastfeeding books. One of the best newer ones is Breastfeeding Made Simple, and one of the older ones is just about to come out in a new edition (The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding).
Being one of those lactation geek types I have to take issue with the one bottle doesn't do any harm notion. There is evidence that even one bottle of formula impacts the infant's gut for weeks and that even one bottle of formula increases the risk of juvenile diabetes. If you insist on someone else feeding the baby at night, at the very least express colostrum for them to use. Also cracked and bleeding nipples are not something to take as the normal course of things. It means that the baby isn't actually nursing correctly. You may have a little bit of soreness from the nipples getting stretched for the first time, but toe curling pain means something needs to be changed ASAP. It may just mean a change in the way you're holding the baby. A LLL Leader or a board certified lactation consultant (they'll have the letters IBCLC after their name) should be able to help you get things straightened around.
Post a Comment