My Dear Internets,
It is with great glee this morning that I must report to you of the demise of "the other woman", my husband's mistress. At 10:00 last night, she passed from this world exactly as she had lived in it, cradled in my husband's hand. He used his considerable skills to restore her to life, but was helpless to do anything but watch her shining face fade forever. This afternoon, he will take her dead shell somewhere I do not know, and see that she is disposed of properly, to return to my home no more.
O happy day!
I do not delude myself. My rival for his affections will be replaced before the day is out by a younger, sexier, more alluring model, but she will be new and awkward. Fear not for me, I am poised and ready for the battle. I have tricks which she can not hope to match.
But for now? This moment? For this moment, he is mine and always will be. When the time for mistresses has passed away, he will find me still here, the wife of his youth. How I long for that day to come.
****Updated to add: The Computer Guy laughed this morning and told me that his mistress will not be replaced by a new model, but by her predecessor. "It won't be a cute young thing, but the MILF model." Hahahahhaha Is it any wonder that I adore him?