People keep asking me how the school situation is going with #3. It's such a difficult question. I'm never really sure how to answer it honestly. He likes it, but comes home from the school day completely exhausted. He's ready to head back in the mornings, but complains about the length of the school day. I agree with him. It's too long.
He now spends more waking hours with strangers than he does with his own family. We miss him, and he misses us. In his eyes, the perfect solution would be for his teacher and classmates to come to our house for school. I would, but I'm not sure where we would put everyone.
I'm finding it difficult to be a part-time parent. The few hours I get with him every night after homework is done and the neighborhood children are played with, is just not enough. This is the major drawback I have seen to traditional schooling. The Computer Guy and I have to share parenting with people we don't know. They spend much more time with him than do we. It's just a numbers game. Most of the time he's under our roof he's sleeping.
I don't know how other parents do this every day without the angst. How can I say that I am parenting him when I get to spend only an hour or two a night with him before bedtime routines begin? How do I shoehorn in all that he needs to know in such a short amount of time? How do other parents reconcile themselves to this? Is it just what we do, so it must be the right thing to do?
I am watching my little boy assume the shape that other people are molding him into being. So far, it is one I can live with, but the power over him that this implies is a bit frightening. How can I protect a child I do not see? I know that eventually we have to let them go, but everything in me says that this is too much way too soon.
How do we balance his need for an education with his need for parents? This is the answer to how is his schooling going? It is a lopsided, backwards tightrope walk and I can't help but feel as if we're missing something....and that the something might be him.
7 comments:
I so, so agree with you on this! THIS is the biggest reason that I started homeschooling--my kids' childhood was going by way too fast and I was seeing way too little of it! Homeschooling or not, by 4 p.m. we're all exhausted, they're loaded down w/homework, and we have to eat, do baths, practice instruments, have a few sibling battles, then we all crash. I miss them so much!
My perfect solution would be half-time school. Say, 8-12. Just do the reading, math, and lunch, then send them back and I'll take care of the rest. This year I'm especially wishing for 1/2 day kindergarten, which isn't an option here.
Homeschooling is something that I have started to discern even though Avery is only 2 and a half. I grew up going to public school, and I loved school because I loved being around my friends!
However, now as a parent, there are so many things to consider! There just doesn't seem to be a perfect solution. :( The idea of homeschooling is growing on me, but I'm not sure if I'm organized enough to handle it even though I do have a degree and a license to teach k-6... haha oh the ironies of life.
But anyway, I can see why you feel so torn, and I don't blame you! I'll keep you and #3 in my prayers!
IS there an option of doing partly public school, the rest of the time home? I know it's an option in Washington.....
Good idea, Foxfier. Idahoans can go to public school part-time, too.
I feel for ya sister! We have an amazing, non-diocesan, microscopic (62 kids K-8), Orthodox, Catholic school my kiddos attend. It's 4 days, M-Th. Fridays are "at home work" days. Some of us call it "homeschooling for sissies." I still miss them but knowing I'll get three full days with them on the weekends is wonderful. Another reason you need to move to Phoenix, besides being my personal beignet chef.
I feel like if I could keep my kids at home for the morning when they are fresh and lovely, then send them to school until dinner time, it would be much better. I hate getting tired cranky kids home at 3:00.
I firmly believe that allowing our kids to be away from us (parents) in an environment that we approve of (for us that's Catholic school) is a wonderful thing. I think kids need that freedom to be learning and growing without their parents around.
Even the best homeschoolers I know manage to incorporate times of shared teaching or sports activities that allow their children these opportunities to spread their wings "on their own".
I just wish we didn't get the remains of the day, I want the beginnings. :)
Sadly, I encounter a lot of parents who don't really have any problem spending as little time with their kids as possible, even when the kids are home with them a very limited time already.
Prayers for you during this time.
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