It was horrible.
I totally blame the mom.
It's not her fault. (According to my much more sane husband.)
I blame her anyway.
I went over before it started and explained the arthritis issue. I don't know her well, but she was friendly and reassuring. It was a spa day party. The girls were getting manicures and making funky hair accessories. #4's physical limitations were not going to be a problem. She was not going to go to a party and be ARTHRITIS GIRL!
And then she was.
she was......
The party guests decided to take an unexpected detour to the trampoline. "What could I do?" My neighbor shrugged. "They were all having such a good time. But #4 seemed a bit upset by it, so I let her stay afterwards to play for a bit because I think she felt a bit left out."
Ummmm...you think she felt left out? I can pretty much guarantee that she felt left out, because she came home, curled up in my arms on the couch, and sobbed about the fact that her friend and her friend's friends completely ignored her while they laughed and jumped on the trampoline.....and she thinks she felt left out? Yeah, mom, she did. Good call.
My much saner husband pointed out to me that a group of 7 and 8 year old girls are very likely to look in the backyard and see a
TRAMPOLINE!!!!!!!!!!!
(I need some glitter again here!)
and be really distracted by that, and also not every mother rules birthday parties like her own little power trip.
My daughter stood on the back porch and watched the party which has been her hope for pulling this week out of the crapper become one big festival of YOU CAN'T DO THIS !!!!!
Is this her life?
Is this the way it's going to be? I read all of these stories about other RA kids and how normal their lives are. Those stories are my "birthday party." They're the hope I'm hanging onto as this all seems to be headed in a crapper-ish direction.
I just want it to be nine weeks ago again. Can anyone fix that for me? Thanks. That would be great.
11 comments:
Oh man! Imagine a groaning sound.
(I wrote to you in my blog post)
Now I will battle those crazy "prove you're not a robot" words. Or else I will have to write comments in my blog post.
{{{great big, long hug}}}
Where does this woman live? I'm going to go over there are kick her in the shin!
My heart breaks for her! I'm so sorry.
:( :(
Well crap, that's Lent with a capital L for you!
What a sweet girl. The only good thing that is going to come from all if this false charity around you both is that soon her real friends, and her real friends' Moms are going to shine like stars in the sky!
PS You know that not only do you have to forgive "clueless Mom", you also have to do something affirmatively nice for her. Little Flower said the quickest way to her heart was to be mean to her and their were lots of " mean girls" in her covent.
Welcome to your Lenten sacrifice. And you thought severe medical emergencies and breastfeeding a newborn would be enough fir Mr Jesus this March. :-) He must have some extra cool plans for you on Easter Sunday!
o be mean to her ...(
You're in our prayers here!
I'm so sorry this happened. I would blame the mom too. Just from a practical standpoint: 1. The party had a theme, why not stick to it instead of letting the kids do what they want. 2. Who lets a bunch of kids jump together on a trampoline anyway, and if they were jumping solo (which is what you are supposed to do) who wants to wait in line to jump on a trampoline at a party, anyway? 3. It will get better, those success stories are probably after months (years) of treatment. -loretta
If the mom knew about the health problem, she could have put the trampoline away, put a tarp over it, etc. She could also have had a talk with her daughter about being sensitive to your daughter (ie, no physical games at party), and thought about what activities would work.
The mom could also have pulled the plug on the trampoline after it started, by announcing that it was time for another desirable activity. (And frankly, she should have, because liability for other people's kids on your trampoline is insane. Also, an adult always has to be spotting for kids on a trampoline, so where was the mom? And how many kids were on that trampoline all at once, if your daughter was the only one left on the ground for long periods? Is this mom insane?)
It's not all that hard to be sensitive to party guests' needs, whether they be physical, religious, or what have you. Proper Prior Planning Prevents Problems.
Oh honey... I'm so sorry.
And, like you, I think I'd have a teeny weeny bit of party-mom anger too.
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